Hey there,
This weekend we put up our Christmas tree. We name these trees, with past years including Mildred and Arthur. My vote this year was for Carol - reliable and festive. But it was rejected for sounding too close to calling her a Karen. So it’s Charlie.
Watching my kids hang ornaments reminded me of another piece of the holidays I enjoy: delegating.
Delegate what?
When I started managing, I was terrible at handing things off. Out of sheer necessity, I started experimenting and later found a delegation decision tool in the book The Manager’s Path.
The premise is that the delegated tasks should advance both the team’s objectives and the individual’s growth to be useful for the group and motivating to the delegate.
Then when picking tasks to hand off, consider the following:
Level of complexity - Can the employee do this independently, and
Frequency - How much time will this task take in the long run?
At work I learned to hand over low-complexity, high-frequency tasks, like straightforward project scoping documents, to senior analysts.
This approach also meant showing rising leaders how to lead one-off, high-profile projects, such as a co-branded digital index, and collaborating with leads on re-occurring strategic tasks, like building out project calendars.
Delegating was necessary, partly because it let folks step up, grow, and show they were ready for promotions.
I also learned the importance of holding on to tedious and infrequent tasks, like booking the dinner reservation for a team outing. Handing these menial things off doesn’t help anyone grow, doesn’t save me much time, and it can create resentment.
Given how well this approach worked at work, I tried it at home.
Delegating disasters
Delegating to kids is more nuanced. For example, tasks can’t be phrased as a question because my kids will think it’s optional.
My kids also needed way more oversight. Their sense of accountability is, ahem, underdeveloped.
I learned this after letting our girls make their lunches last year. My first grader filled her bag with snacks and stopped eating her sandwich. Then she forgot to put her lunchbox in her backpack, so I had to run from work to bring it to school.
Now, I own school lunches and watch my girls make their weekend sandwiches. This one will stay a ‘partnership’ for a while.
Overall, however, I’ve found my kids are excited to do complex tasks because it gives them a sense of independence - that they’re bigger kids.
And they’re usually able to do more than I’d expect.
Tasks like clearing their dinner plates were handed off as young as possible. My preschooler was excited to show he could reach the counter with his dishes. And setting expectations early helps the habit stick.
My eldest daughter started fishing this summer - an infrequent and intricate task that makes me feel squeamish. She learned to cut the worm, put it on the hook, cast the line, unhooks the fish for her siblings, and throw it in the bucket of water.
While I was there, so no one drowned, she knew I wouldn’t cut that worm for her. She enjoyed getting this independence, and I enjoyed relaxing on the dock.
I’ve also stopped trying to delegate simple one-off tasks, like bringing in a delivery package. It ends up being more of a fight than it’s worth, and I’m not sure what it teaches them.
While managing career and kids is a lot, there are bright spots. My article “3 ½ reasons why becoming a parent made me a better leader” covers some here.
Delusional stock photos aside, it discusses seeing potential in others, setting the culture, triaging priorities, and separating ego from work performance.
Cheers,
P.S. I'd love to hear a topic idea or suggestion. Could you reply and tell me?
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Resources discovered:
SplashLearn - An early school math and reading app that my girls will actually use, and they seem to be learning. It’s not free, but it gives detailed progress reports.
Bumpin’ - Health tech investor Leslie Schrock’s take on pregnancy and the 4th trimester. I found it concise, funny, and practical, with a refreshing tone.
GitLab’s Parental Advice - The company’s manager tool kit for supporting employees going on and returning from parental leave. Includes a to-do list, retry-buddy program, and more—an excellent example of a thoughtful plan.